Back home...the "in-between-space"

As an expat family, you might be “back home” with a strange “in‑between feeling”. The holidays are definitely over (and you've taken down the Christmas tree), but you don’t quite feel ready to get back into routines. What you do feel is the weight of what’s coming: work, school, commuting, homework, lunches, activities. Your teens might also feel similar and are irritable, meh, or extra tired. Inside you, there’s this one question that quietly shows up: So, now what is this “normal life” I’m coming back to?

It can feel like a big emotional dip — a mix of deflation, sadness, and a quiet dread that everything is about to get busy again, but not in a fun way. And as expats, there is often another layer: the readjusting again to “home”. I usually have two days of feeling sad (as I just said goodbye to my daughter), meh, and I get really quiet… If you know me, you know that’s not a good sign…

What do I do? What can you do? What can we, as expats, do in these moments?

Well, instead of just waiting for real life to “set back in,” you can use this time as a gentle transition, especially for teens who may feel restless, uneasy, or secretly anxious about the next school or college year.

1.        Normalize the in‑between

Acknowledge that feeling “meh” or empty after the holidays is normal. That it’s not a sign that something is wrong, especially in expat life where “home” is layered and transitions are constant.​

2.        Re‑ground in gentle routines

Adjust school‑adjacent rhythms softly: earlier bedtimes, family dinners, and definitely a “screens off” window in the evening to help their nervous system slow down (and yes, I do know, that you'll receive push-back for that).​

Ask your teen what new routine they'd like to try out. Maybe it’s laying out the clothes for the next day the evening before or trying to get homework done before dinner three times this week.

3.        Create one “back‑to‑real‑life” activity

Design a small ritual for the weekend that marks the "official" start of the new year: a family walk to talk about highlights and challenges of the winter break, burning or shredding old 2025 to‑do lists, or a “goodbye holidays, hello new start” hot chocolate evening.

Let your teen contribute ideas so it feels like something you are creating together, not another “family rule.”

4.        Make space for micro‑adventures

Plan 1–3 simple, low‑pressure outings before the full school and after schedule kicks in: exploring a new café, visiting a museum, going to the movies, or taking public transport to a part of town you never visit.

5.        Help teens process the emotional hangover

Ask gentle questions: “What do you miss most about the holidays?” and “What are you dreading about being back at school?” This is to connect with your teen without trying to fix anything in that moment.

Validate their mixed feelings: the excitement of seeing friends, the boredom of routine, and the sadness of leaving the holidays behind.

6.        Reconnect socially, at their pace

Offer options like inviting one friend over, watching an online movie, or having a game afternoon.

If friendships span countries (yep, I know, common for expat teens), suggest a scheduled call with a friend abroad, framing it as “starting the new year together.”

7.        Introduce new tiny pockets of autonomy

Use these early days to hand over small responsibilities like (this time really) managing their own alarm or choosing their perfect time to take the evening shower.

Enjoy settling back into your home, getting ready for 2026, and being ready for all that 2026 has to offer!

Kindly,

Andrea